


Sanctuary

by youcouldmakealife



Series: Impaired Judgment (and other excuses) [75]
Category: Original Work
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-10
Updated: 2019-02-10
Packaged: 2019-10-25 22:01:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17733461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youcouldmakealife/pseuds/youcouldmakealife
Summary: “Okay, damn,” Chaz says. “That’s uh. A ring.”He sounds like the actual ‘proposed’ thing just belatedly sunk in, and honestly, Jared can relate.





	Sanctuary

Jared sits on the couch, frozen, for awhile. He doesn’t know how long. He doesn’t know when Bryce is going to be back either — he could be just taking a walk around the block to cool off, he could be booking a hotel room right now, or walking into a bar and ordering shots. He does know, miserable, stomach in knots, that if Bryce comes back any time soon and Jared’s still there, they’re just going to end up fighting again, and he doesn’t want that. He wasn’t — he wasn’t lying to Bryce, he isn’t mad at him, and he doesn’t want to _be_ mad at him.

So he needs to leave, basically, but he’s not sure where to go. He can’t exactly go to his parents — even if he could pretend that nothing was wrong, and honestly, he’s really not good at that, he’s still kind of furious with them for thinking they had a right to speak on his behalf. The last thing he wants to do right now is hand them ammo, let them think they were in the right to tell Bryce no.

Time’s kind of of the essence if Bryce just went to cool off for a minute, so Jared shoves his feet into the nearest pair of sneakers, grabs the nearest hoodie. He’s pretty sure both are Bryce’s, but whatever. He’s almost out the door before he realises he probably shouldn’t be wearing a ring on his left ring finger — not that he thinks anyone would recognise him on the streets or anything, but what if he randomly runs into like, one of the Hitmen, or one of his aunts or a former coach or something? It’s not out of the realm of possibility. And he’s going to have to pass the concierge on his way out, who like, is pretty clearly aware Jared and Bryce live together. He can just see the headlines now.

Jared looks at his ring, considering, before pulling it off. And it fucking — he feels fucking _shitty_ doing it, but even if they were — he obviously can’t wear it out, so. He considers putting it in his wallet, but he’s worried he’ll lose it, considers switching it to his right hand, but it feels wrong, so he ends up undoing the chain Bryce got him, stringing the ring on it and tucking both under his shirt after he puts it back on.

Jared ends up at a Tim Hortons down the block, sipping coffee that’s way shittier than the stuff they have at home. He’s put nothing in his stomach today except black coffee and like, stress, and he should probably change that, but he can’t bring himself to eat anything right now, stuck with an ugly nausea that grows with every sip he takes, every thought he has of where Bryce might be right now. He is honestly not fit for being in public right now, must look like an absolute wreck, so he texts the only person who could offer him a non-public place to be right now.

_Are you at home?_ Jared texts.

_Ya you want to come over?_ , Chaz asks.

_If that’s cool_ , Jared texts, then, _You’re home alone, right?_. Ashley’s nice, but she also kind of counts as the public right now; he doesn’t know her well enough to be comfortable crashing if she’s there.

_Are you planning a robbery?_ , Chaz texts, followed by, _Ya tho_

Jared trashes his coffee, does the short walk to Chaz’s, as central to the Saddledome as Bryce’s is. Chaz buzzes him up with an ‘it’s unlocked’, and Jared trudges in, kicking off his — Bryce’s — shoes. 

“Yo,” Chaz says, not looking up from whatever video game has his attention.

“Hey,” Jared says. Hangs up Bryce’s hoodie on Chaz’s fancy little coat rack. 

“Want some coffee? Ash left a pot on before she went to work,” Chaz asks. “Like, an hour ago, it’s not like morning stale or anything.”

Jared’s laugh comes out sharp and miserable.

“Whoa, okay, no coffee,” Chaz says, then, looking over, “Dude, you look like shit.”

“Thanks,” Jared says.

“What happened?” Chaz asks. “Bryce was like, disturbingly happy at practice, it was freaking everyone the hell out, so I’m guessing it’s not relationship shit?”

“I—,” Jared says.

“You’re not injured are you?” Chaz asks, putting his controller down.

“No,” Jared says. “Bryce proposed last night.” If Bryce isn’t cool with Chaz knowing about it, maybe he should have fucking thought of that before he asked Jared to marry him.

“Holy shit,” Chaz says.

“Yeah,” Jared says.

“Holy shit,” Chaz repeats, then, “And you’re not like, grinning, so I’m guessing this isn’t like, you asking me to be your flower girl?”

“Great deductive skills,” Jared says.

“Did you say no or something?” Chaz asks.

“No,” Jared says. “Then kind of — still no, but kind of? Not no, but.”

“Okay, sit down and like, put words together in sentences that make sense,” Chaz says, scooting to the end of the couch.

“Fuck off,” Jared mutters, but takes a seat.

“So are you engaged or not?” Chaz asks.

“I don’t know,” Jared says miserably. He stares at the pause menu for some shooter — honestly, he’s not sure which, everything unfocused. Blurry. He blinks rapidly, tries to clear that up. It’s not cool to walk into someone’s apartment and burst into tears on them.

Chaz turns off the TV. “So uh,” Chaz says. “You’re not wearing a ring. Did he not give you one, or—”

Jared pulls his chain out from under his shirt.

“Okay, damn,” Chaz says. “That’s uh. A ring.”

He sounds like the actual ‘proposed’ thing just belatedly sunk in, and honestly, Jared can relate.

“Yeah,” Jared says.

“You’re not wearing it,” Chaz says. There is a lot of stating the obvious going on here.

“Can’t wear it outside my apartment,” Jared says, “Who knows, the concierge in our building might get the right idea.”

“Dude, turn the snide down,” Chaz says. “I didn’t do anything.”

“Sorry,” Jared mumbles.

“Where’s BJ right now?” Chaz says.

Jared shrugs a shoulder.

“You guys fight?” Chaz asks, and Jared raises his shoulder again.

“Do you not want to marry him, or—” Chaz says.

“I do,” Jared says. “I just — he’s not ready to get married.”

“I mean, I’m assuming he’d disagree considering the whole proposing thing,” Chaz says.

“Okay, but like,” Jared says. “Part of getting married is people actually _knowing you’re together_ , it’s sort of required, and he’s not ready for that, so this whole thing is like, a sham.”

“Did you actually ask him if he was ready for that, or are you just assuming he isn’t?” Chaz asks.

“He _isn’t_ , though,” Jared says.

“That’s kind of for him to decide, dude,” Chaz says.

“He hasn’t even told his _grandma_ he’s gay,” Jared says. “Fuck’s sakes, he wouldn’t get within three feet of me when we hung out with you and Ashley, even after you told him she was cool and wouldn’t tell anyone. So no, I don’t need to ask whether he’s cool letting like, someone at City Hall and his accountant and fucking _Flames management_ know he’s marrying a guy, because the answer is fuck no, and I didn’t really want to hear it less than twenty-four hours after he proposed when he _clearly doesn’t actually want to marry me_.”

Okay, Jared is maybe a little mad at Bryce right now.

“Shit,” Chaz says, which about sums it up. “You want a beer?” 

“No,” Jared says, because it isn’t even dinnertime yet, then, “Yes.”

“You want to keep talking about it, or you want a distraction?” Chaz asks when he returns with two beers.

Jared’s thought of nothing else all day, so a distraction sounds pretty good right now. “Second one,” he says, and Chaz turns the TV back on, lets Jared pick the game. It doesn’t matter what he picks — Chaz thrashes him across the board, and doesn’t even chirp him about it, but at least it’s a couple hours Jared isn’t dwelling on shit. Chaz orders dinner, and Jared inhales it, suddenly ravenous and more tipsy than he’d like from beer on an empty stomach, and then they watch a bunch of episodes of Mythbusters Jared’s already seen.

“You heading back tonight?” Chaz asks.

Bryce hasn’t texted him. Jared has no idea if he’s home or not.

“I—” Jared says, then shrugs weakly.

“You can stay if you want,” Chaz says. “Guest room’s like, basically my storage room, sorry, but the bed’s clear, at least.”

Chaz gives him sweats and an old Hitman shirt before bed, pats his shoulder kind of awkwardly. Or maybe it’s just that Jared feels awkward, barging in and basically inviting himself to sleep in Chaz’s guest room.

“It’ll work out,” Chaz says, but Jared stays up half the night thinking about all the ways it obviously won’t. 

*

Jared makes breakfast in the morning as an apology, steers clear of Chaz’s coffee. More video games, and then Chaz has to head out for the Flames game.

“You can come,” Chaz says, but like he knows Jared is going to say no. “You gonna just chill here today?”

“If that’s okay,” Jared says.

“Yeah, no worries,” Chaz says. “Open invite, dude. You need my key? I’d give you my spare, but Ash has it.”

“Not really planning on heading anywhere, so,” Jared says. “I’m good.”

“Okay,” Chaz says, and Jared hovers a little as he puts on his shoes. “What?”

“Don’t bring it up,” Jared says. “Like, if Bryce tells you —” He’s not going to, though. “Don’t bring it up if he doesn’t?”

“Okay,” Chaz says.

“And don’t tell him I’m here,” Jared says.

“Dude,” Chaz says.

“I just — I need a day to think, okay?” Jared asks. 

“I’m not going to walk up to him and be like ‘hey bro, your bf slept in my guest room last night’,” Chaz says. “But if he asks if I know where you are, I’m not going to lie to him for you.”

“Fine,” Jared says, ignoring the part of him that wants to correct the ‘bf’ part of Chaz’s sentence. He’s sure Bryce won’t ask anyway; that would require acknowledging Jared’s existence, possibly even in public.

Jared does absolutely nothing. He has no idea where the time goes, but seven hits and the game’s on, and Jared curls up on Chaz’s couch and watches them get absolutely slaughtered by the Lightning. Jared doesn’t know if he’s imagining that Bryce seems off — probably not, considering the commentators mention it a few times. That’s his fault, probably, though Bryce could have played the best game of his career and they’d still have probably lost this one.

He doesn’t change the channel when the game ends, listens to the talking heads pick apart everything they did wrong. Thinks about how that’s probably going to be him in a year, especially with the way the Oilers play. Another reason marriage is probably just a pipe dream — how many married couples don’t even live in the same _city_? 

There’s a knock on the door about an hour after the game ends, and Jared hopes Chaz is trying to be polite or can’t find his keys or something, because Jared isn’t really feeling fit for talking to someone non-Chaz, whether that’s Ashley or just someone delivering a package. Not that deliveries are usually scheduled for eleven, so. Maybe Chaz ordered a postgame meal?

It is neither Ashley nor a delivery person. Not Chaz either.

“Hey,” Bryce says.

“Hi,” Jared says. “I guess—” 

He guesses Bryce did ask, then. Or Chaz lied to Jared about approaching Bryce with the info. He doubts that, though, so Bryce probably asked. Chaz didn’t say he’d literally lead Bryce right to him, but then, he didn’t say he wouldn’t, either.

“We lost,” Bryce says.

“I was watching,” Jared says. “Sorry.”

“Yeah,” Bryce says, then, quietly, “You’re not wearing the ring.”

Jared pulls it out from under his shirt. “Concierge might have seen me walk out wearing it,” he says. “I know you wouldn’t like that, so. On a chain seemed safest. Least likely for anyone to actually catch on.”

“Jared,” Bryce says.

“Don’t tell me you’d be fine with it,” Jared says.

“I would be,” Bryce says.

“And if someone sees and puts two and two together?” Jared asks.

“Then it happens,” Bryce says.

“You don’t actually mean that,” Jared says.

“I do, though,” Bryce says.

“Or you do when it’s just a hypothetical, but if it actually happened you’d resent me forever for forcing you to come out before you were ready,” Jared says. 

Bryce blows out a breath. “No, I wouldn’t.”

“Like I said, right now it’s just a hypothetical,” Jared says. “It’d be different if it wasn’t.”

“I want to marry you,” Bryce says. “You don’t seem to believe me, but—”

“I do believe you,” Jared says. “And I do too, I just —”

“Come home?” Bryce says. “Come home and we’ll talk about this?”

“You can’t walk out again,” Jared says, doesn’t know why his eyes are stinging. 

“I won’t,” Bryce says. “Just. Come home with me.”

“Okay,” Jared says, gets Bryce’s shoes on, his hoodie, then stalling by the door, “I don’t have a key, and I can’t just leave Chaz’s place unlocked.”

“He’s the one who let me in the building,” Bryce says. “He’s in the lobby.”

“I can’t believe we like, exiled Chaz from his own apartment,” Jared says, hesitates after he closes the door. “Should we wait, or?”

Bryce pulls his phone out. “I’m letting him know we’re heading out, he’ll come up,” he says.

“Okay,” Jared says. Probably less awkward for Chaz if they’re not hovering in his hall waiting for him, wafting relationship baggage.

“Can you put it on?” Bryce asks while they’re waiting for the elevator.

“What?” Jared asks.

“The ring?” Bryce asks.

“What if someone sees it?” Jared asks.

“I don’t care,” Bryce says. “Just. Please?”

Jared puts the ring on, and in the elevator, Bryce reaches out, rubbing his thumb over it, their fingers tangling for a minute before the doors open to the lobby and he lets go.

**Author's Note:**

> [Reminder I have a tumblr for this 'verse!](http://youcouldmakealife.tumblr.com)


End file.
